Hey Beautiful People,
As promised I'm putting up another blog post cause consistency lol... I recently stumbled upon a great post about being single over 30 on Sade Solomon's blog you can check out the post here . Her post inspired me to write this post for a few reasons, but before I give my perspective here's a little about me... I'm not over 30, I'm in my late 20's but do feel pressure every now and then to get married. I also hold dear the value of marriage and my faith in the bible plays a huge part in that so I have high respect for the sacred union.
Photocredit: @Munaluchibride on Instagram
"This is going to be a shocker but as a single woman I can assure you that there are many of us that are just fine, living life, traveling, sincerely fulfilled and honestly at peace."
I could relate to a lot of what Sade expressed in her post. While I don't share the same desire Sade has for a mate (I loved her transparency) I do feel the pressure often times from well-meaning family and friends. The strangest part about not feeling sadness about being single is how much people actually want you to be sad.
Now, now, I agree that there are many ladies that wouldn't turn down a proposal from the right person, even if being married hadn't been on their radar but that's not the same thing as desiring an even praying for someone to come into your life to get married. This is going to be a shocker but as a single woman I can assure you that there are many of us that are just fine, living life, traveling, sincerely fulfilled and honestly at peace. Will I feel differently in a few years, quite possibly, and I'm fully accepting of that. I'm not trying to shame anyone that is or has struggled with being single, I'm just saying that's not everyone's truth.
"The sad part is that in 2018 we still put too much value on a person’s marital status, rather than on them as a person."
When we open up to family and friend about being in a good place with being single what we don't need is married folks (cause y'all are normally the culprit) trying to basically talk us into being upset, sad, lost, and depressed about our marital status. Support us, be a listening ear, be a plus one, be and asset not a liability. Your single friend (even the one that is struggling with being single) doesn't want to be made out to be charity case. The sad part is that in 2018 we still put too much value on a person’s marital status, rather than on them as a person. This can especially be true if you live by bible values, and in faith based circles. Yes, marriage is a gift from god, but so is life.... which last time I checked we get to no matter our relationship status.
I love that women being single and choosing paths other than marriage is becoming normalized... but until then it's a least good we can have these kind of conversations....
Until Next Time...